Easyriders Australia SMC Ipswich Chapter

Topic: Questions that Haunt Me!!

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Forum Home > Jokes and Gags > Questions that Haunt Me!!
Dottie
Dottie
Member
Posts: 321

QUESTIONS THAT HAUNT ME!!!


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If you have sex with a prostitute against her will, is it considered rape or shoplifting?


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Can you cry under water?


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How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?


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Why do you have to "put your two cents in"... But it's only a "penny for your thoughts"?  Where's that extra penny going to?


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Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?


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Why does a round pizza come in a square box?


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What disease did cured ham actually have?


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How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?


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Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?


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If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?


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Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?


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Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?


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Why do doctors leave the room while you change?

They're going to see you naked anyway.


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Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?


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Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?


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If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?


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Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane ?


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If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?


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Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours?

They're both dogs!


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If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?


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If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?


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If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?


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Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?


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Why did you just try singing the two songs above?


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Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?


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Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?


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04:13 AM on 01/29/2009 Flag Quote & Reply
Dottie
Dottie
Member
Posts: 321


Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?


Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?

Why you don't ever see the headline: "Psychic Wins Lottery"?


Why "abbreviated" is such a long word?


Why Doctors call what they do "practice"?

Why you have to click on "Start" to stop Windows XP?

Why lemon juice is made with artificial flavor, while dishwashing
    liquid is made with real lemons?


Why the man who invests all your money is called a "Broker"?


Why there isn't mouse flavored cat food?


Who tastes dog food when it has a "new & improved" flavor?


Why Noah didn't swat those two mosquitoes?


Why they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?


Why they don't make the whole plane out of the material used for the
    indestructible black box?


Why they are called apartments when they are all stuck together?


If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?

Why they call the airport "the terminal" if flying is so safe?


 Tongue

04:17 AM on 01/29/2009 Flag Quote & Reply
Dottie
Dottie
Member
Posts: 321

Does moving the mouse on the pad make a computer program open more quickly?

Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?

Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken there... I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta it's rear."

If it's Zero degrees outside today and
it's supposed to be Twice as
cold tomorrow, how cold is it going to be?

Why do scientists call it "re"search when looking for
something new?

Why is it called a building when it is already built?

Is it possible to be totally partial?

If a book about failures doesn't sell, is it a success?

What do you do when you see an endangered animal that
eats only endangered plants?

Why do your feet smell, and your nose run?

If all the world is a stage, where is the audience
sitting?

If you got into a taxi and he started driving backwards,
would the taxi driver end up owing you money?

If you take an Oriental person and spin him around several times, does he become disoriented?

If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

Why did kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

--
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Lead me not into temptation
I know my own way there

04:19 AM on 01/29/2009 Flag Quote & Reply

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